Cpl James Clayson
Royal Air Force
I joined the Royal Air Force in April 2013 as a Logistics Mover. Like many others, I was excited to serve, to travel, and to be part of something bigger than myself. Over the years, I was fortunate to deploy to Iraq, Cyprus, Qatar, Alaska, and Kuwait — and alongside those deployments, I’ve also had the opportunity to travel extensively with work, experiencing different cultures and building connections across the globe. These experiences have shaped my perspective and strengthened my resilience.
But behind the uniform, I was struggling. I had bottled up a lot of emotions over the years and never really dealt with them. In 2018, I made the difficult decision to leave the RAF due to declining mental health. I was dealing with depression and anxiety, and at the time, I didn’t fully understand how much of that was tied to not living as my authentic self.
That period away from service became a turning point. It gave me the space to reflect, to heal, and to finally come to terms with my sexuality. I embraced my identity as a bisexual man, found the courage to speak openly with friends and family, and eventually met a partner who supported and celebrated me for who I was. Though that relationship has since ended, we remain very good friends. I’m now with a new partner — a man who continues to support me and with whom I can truly be myself.
In May 2020, I rejoined the RAF — not just as the person I was, but as the person I had always been beneath the surface. This time, I returned as openly bisexual, and I was met with acceptance and support from many of the colleagues I had previously served with. It was incredibly affirming to be welcomed back without judgment. I also found that I was far more comfortable speaking about my sexuality when meeting new people — something I never imagined I’d be able to do. Since returning, I’ve had the privilege of serving as the Deputy Sexual Orientation Lead for the RAF LGBTQ+ Network — a role I’ve since handed over, but one that allowed me to support others and help shape a more inclusive culture. I now continue that work as a Unit Rep for the LGBTQ+ Network at RAF Marham.
While I can’t speak firsthand about what life was like before the ban was lifted in 2000, I’ve witnessed meaningful progress during my time in service. There’s a growing sense of community, greater visibility for LGBTQ+ personnel, and a genuine commitment across the organisation to listen, learn, and evolve. The culture has become more open and supportive, and while there’s always more work to be done, the strides we’ve made are significant — and they give me real hope for the future.
My message is clear:
Learn from the past — not to dwell on it, but to ensure we never repeat it. Respect your colleagues for who they are, regardless of background or identity. Take the time to understand different perspectives; it strengthens our teams and our mission. Lead with integrity, act with kindness, and support one another. Every member of the RAF deserves the right to serve authentically, without fear or shame — and with pride in who they are and what they contribute.
